Ok. But saying that. I met many wonderful people. A young African man that had a tumour cut off his spine. Got all his movement back and finally went home. Then there was another African man that always met me in gym in the mornings so we could ride bicycle together. Him on the normal bike and me sitting in my wheelchair with my feet strapped to the peddles and then we cycle until our therapists find us. I also met 2 ladies one my age that had been in a boating accident and broke her spine that she was paralysed. I’ve watched this lady keep fighting through the years never giving up to walk again. And then there was sian tae. I can say her name because she was in the newspapers for having a rare disease. This girl had become paralysed from the epidural while birthing her little boy. After the procedure. She never got her legs back. But she fought to walk and fought to run. 5 years later. She gets cancer and dies from that. I was heartbroken. But I admire the fight she put up and u just couldn’t get to her.

And now back to me. I had stay in the rehabilitation center for 2 months. Finally I come home. Now things are weird. By this stage, I had birthed a baby, then had a stroke. I’m home but barely able to walk. And found out my fiance had been sending emails to other woman while I was going through all this. So I email both woman and explain who I am and I forward the other ladies email to one. Then swooped and did the same thing to the second. I apologise to both of them for my man being a man who’re and press send. Then I get a message from a friend only to find out he tried to get her to move in my house. Except he didn’t know. We knew each other. So I tell her everything I found out and said I believe her. Later I confront him. But his words to me were. Are u trying to fuck my life up. Nevermind everything I had been through. And that’s when I knew it was not going to work. Any ways jumping 1 year later. I’ve just celebrated my babies first birthday and was very proud that I was back to driving and being able to go out on my own by now. Stood and baked for my child’s birthday and because she was a baby I made pink cupcakes in the shape of a big number 1. Boy was I slapped in the face. So I explain instead of a cake I did cupcakes. I got sworn at and he stormed out going to the shop and bought a cake to let everyone sing. Needless to say it ended up she got scared of the lights being off and everyone singing that she cried and I put a stop to everything putting lights on. A month or so later our roads water is switched off. So now making bottles. I needed to fetch water from my mom’s. So I take the kids and go. I get back and I park the car. My eldest helps me get baby out car and we take water bottles and go inside. As I step inside I see my France’s work bag laying in the middle of the floor packed. So I ask him if the work called for him to go offshore again. He tells me no. I’m leaving. Now I’m confused things have been ok. I’ve bbeen doing therapy and learning how to cope without anyone to help me look after my baby. He stated so nicely I’m lraving u. So I ask again. Why. He looks at me and tells me u to much of a bitch since u had ur stroke. I stand there in shock and look at him. I can’t bbelieve I loved u. Ur a selfish bastard. What the he’ll did u expect from me. I’d had a c section then a stroke and a year later u expect a bed of roses. Yet u running behind my back like a whore. Ok now I need a small break. The next section will be very emotional for me.